28 Things Only Someone with Moderate to Severe Crohn’s Would Understand

Medically reviewed by Elaine K. Luo, M.D. — Written by Ben Morrison — Updated on September 20, 2018

As Crohn’s patients, we experience the bathroom with a different set of eyes … and smells. Get your toilet paper or baby wipes ready — here are 28 things only someone living with Crohn’s will understand.

1. Baby wipes aren’t just for babies.

Crohn's black and white cartoon

2. It’s possible to clog a toilet bowl without paper.

Crohn's black and white cartoon

3. “Fast food” describes the speed at which it will come out of your butt.

Crohn's black and white cartoon

4. Italian food puts a hit on your small intestine.

Crohn's black and white cartoon

5. Public restroom, private nightmare.

Crohn's black and white cartoon

6. It’s wise to only purchase brown or black underwear.

Share on Pinterest

7. Matches burn away shame.

Share on Pinterest

8. Sometimes you’re on so many meds that the pills are a meal on their own.

Share on Pinterest

9. Infusion is for readers.

Share on Pinterest

10. When you obstruct, you understand the pain of childbirth.

Share on Pinterest

11. There are many ways to prep an H.

Share on Pinterest

12. If they love you despite the smells that come out of your butt, they’re the one.

Share on Pinterest

13. Your colon is a cave of mysteries. Be prepared for explorers.

Share on Pinterest

14. Barium is like a McDonald’s vanilla shake, except without the flavor or the happy.

Share on Pinterest

15. Small talk is largely annoying during a colonoscopy.

Share on Pinterest

16. We find bathrooms the way Indiana Jones finds treasure.

Share on Pinterest

17. Solid poo means it’s going to be a good day.

Share on Pinterest

18. The more ingredients it contains, the more reasons you have not to eat it.

Share on Pinterest

19. Great outdoors, awful bathrooms.

Share on Pinterest

20. Aisle seat, dude. Aisle seat.

Share on Pinterest

21. Steroids make your muscles bigger, mostly the ones in your face.

Share on Pinterest

22. Obstruction + salad = the opposite of healthy.

Share on Pinterest

23. Speeding tickets can be less costly than dry cleaning tickets.

Share on Pinterest

24. Mike McCready is a rock star for a whooooooole different reason.

Share on Pinterest

25. If Gandalf had Crohn’s and encountered popcorn, he’d yell, “You shall not pass!”

Share on Pinterest

26. Drinking to forget your pain will only make you remember your Crohn’s.

Share on Pinterest

27. IBD is worth it just to get out of jury duty.

Share on Pinterest

28. Crohn’s makes people interesting, deep, intelligent, and cool.

Share on Pinterest

How we reviewed this article:

Share this article

Medically reviewed by Elaine K. Luo, M.D. — Written by Ben Morrison — Updated on September 20, 2018

Read this next